Random Tuesday – Avoiding drama, probably delusional, experiencing an odd (happy) feeling

  • I’ve been coming to terms with many of the stresses I’ve been experiencing lately, from the perception my friends are excluding me (I think I’m overreacting) to losing my last grandparent (hey, it happens eventually); I feel like I am getting to a place where my mind is not in constant turmoil.
  • I think what I have been realizing lately is how your life is always going through changes and into new phases, where all of a sudden, it isn’t the way it was before. For example, I think there was a time when I was out on the outside of this friend group, then I began doing more stuff with just the women, then we got to a place where all our families were hanging out, and now it is rotating again. It is never stagnant for long but I am always caught off guard by the shift. In the end, I need to look at it as Team Smith first and foremost (the kids as a priority, then the entire family, and the husband/wife dynamic)
  • I know that in probably 5-8 years or so, it will be very different. I have a feeling one of the main families in our parent group will move. They have the oldest kids and have already expressed wanting to live elsewhere. I know then that our friend group will shift again. As it is, we already have multiple groups we see for different reasons. I used to be afraid to lose the folks I had but I think I have learned instead that it’s ok to focus on family first then different groups, etc. I need to remember it will change.
  • I think a reason I can’t wait until Fall semester begins is because when I am that busy, I don’t have time to worry about the drama. And I can also use that as an excuse to avoid, which is probably bad in the long run but how I handle things sometimes.
  • Funny thing though – last night while watching an episode of The Terminal List (which is amazing if you have not seen it) I got a text from one of my friends and she invited us to her husband’s graduation party. I look at this as a pretty big deal, re: my feeling like they’ve been excluding us. So maybe it’s just a perception or maybe they really just do things willy nilly and never “purposely” excluded us. Sometimes people get busy and it just happens. I get it, I really do.
  • As noted in previous posts, this summer was financially difficult for me. I had fewer teaching sections so it was tight. I am looking forward to next week when I am a little freer to spend and you know what? I’m going to sink myself into the back-to-school stuff for the kids to hit that retail therapy high. I mean, I don’t particularly need anything for myself but the shopping will be fun.
  • I guess I am officially back to running; been doing some 2-3 milers a few times a week. It feels good to get back out there. I keep forgetting that with this lost weight, it really is a lot easier. Getting out and working my body, listening to music, and accomplishing something is so helpful for my overall psyche too.
  • I was driving to work today and music just hit differently; I wasn’t too depressed and I felt ready to tackle stuff. This is an excellent move in the right direction!

3 thoughts on “Random Tuesday – Avoiding drama, probably delusional, experiencing an odd (happy) feeling

  1. I’ve seen the terminal list. Excellent.

    Being busy does help in not worrying about things so much.

    Thank you for joining the Happy Tuesday Blog Hop.

    Have a fabulous Happy Tuesday. ♥

  2. It’s not so much idle hands that are the devil’s playground as it is an idle mind, at least it seems so to me. When i’m actively engaged in doing, especially doing for others or working, i’m not so busy contemplating and overanalyzing every little thing that happens.

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