MMMM + I just don’t know anymore


All in all, life is good. I should stop whining. But I have not felt right for a long time. But let’s go back. Friday I had a short shift (as I do today; I enjoy my week being bookended by those) and as soon as I got home, Ash and I left for the movies. Well, we got our tickets then went into Costco to eat their pizza because it is cheap. Then we went back over to the theater and saw the new Top Gun, which was actually good. We picked the kids up from camp then met our friend and his dad at a brewery to pick up their limited release Young Chief. When we got home, we were supposed to hang out with this friend along with his daughter because she is friends with mine but it never came to fruition. And that was ok; I didn’t really feel like doing any more, especially since I was hoping to hear from that job and I never did. They did say Friday or Monday. Fingers crossed and all that.

Saturday I woke up and started working on the pool, which was going green yet again. I’d taken a water sample the morning before so I took it to the pool store and they gave me a whole regimen to begin on, complete with baking soda, acid, jugs of chlorine, etc. It was a very productive day with that and Ash and I worked on some beer transferring and cleaning. In the evening, we dropped my son off at his friend’s house and the rest of us went to a Tallahassee Soccer club game. It was really fun but we did lose, sadly. But the atmosphere was cool and we got some good street tacos from a food truck. When we got home, everyone was exhausted but we watched some home videos of the kids before going to bed.

Sunday morning, the pool was looking way better! I was really happy about that. I started on laundry then took the boys to our friend’s house because her son was turning 15 and having some guys over. I returned the chlorine jugs, made tacos, and then worked on laundry again. We went back over to Courtney and Robert’s and hung out until the party was over. When we got home, I planted this portion of an aloe plant Bridgette gave me then talked to my mom on the phone for about an hour. Made the kids some dinner then Ash and I watched The Boys and went to sleep!

So yes, I feel like it was a very good weekend but I am still plagued by the liminal space. So I’ve written before about how I felt like I was on the edge of something, a precipice if you will, and I just got an article come across my news feed about liminal spaces. Physically, these are in-between spaces like doorways and stairwells but emotionally, it’s what I have been talking about: in an in-between state of knowing or not. And that’s this whole job thing. I may be superstitious but I think that article showed up to educate me about why I feel this way. There’s definitely an unknown and this all plays in. Or I am overthinking it all but hey, I like to imagine things happen for some reason.

On that note, I have this 3 day professional development thing through one of my college jobs next week and I wasn’t sure how I’d work my tutoring job and participate but my boss here is totally cool with me doing it. In fact, they encourage that kind of thing so that works out.

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I guess it’s a freebie week so I am at a loss. LOL. Should I be? No, but I haven’t really discovered anything new and I’ve really just been listening to yacht rock but oh, I thought of one: a Jimmy Buffett song I recently rediscovered I suppose.

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