- Monday, 3:08 PM: I am sad today. There is very little to work on – university jobs are like that. It goes up and down as the semester goes in its own special kinds of waves. But last week, I ended up talking to a handful of the TAs for hours at a time – about anything and everything – and I feel like today, it’s so quiet and I’m left so alone. And this is funny to be because I like being alone and almost always shy away from social interaction.
- Monday, 3:27 PM: I downloaded a sample of a book called Florida by Lauren Groff. I have been interested in it for a while and now she is coming to speak at my university so I thought I’d finally read a snippet. Sadly, it let me down. She has beautiful language and in the short portion I read, I did like some of the ways she spoke of a familiar place, but there was an element of irreconcilable sadness throughout and no true ending. I can handle short stories without endings but hers felt abrupt. At least I didn’t just buy it outright I suppose.
- Tuesday, 9:39 AM: I am home sick. I started feeling off around noon yesterday then really bad around 3:45. Went home and took a bath and felt generally tired and cold all evening. Today, my head and neck ache and I’m sleepy but I want to feel ok. The A/C guy is coming to repair some pipes in a bit and I plan to go to Publix for soup for lunch then nap on and off.
- Tuesday, 10:02 AM: I am trying not to think about the fact that one of my favorite wrestlers just announced that his leukemia is back. I don’t think anyone knew he’d struggled before and so it was a bomb last night when he came out, used his real name and talked about leaving to go fight it. His best wrestling friends came out too, all crying, and it was shocking to say the least. I try to think of them just as characters in a story but I know they’re real people with serious struggles. It’s really bringing me down today.
- Tuesday, 10:40 AM: A/C guy is here. The weather is overcast and gross; it’s sprinkling a little. I can see the bottom of my pool today though, which is a vast improvement. After the hurricane, it looked like a green slimy pond. We worked every day to dredge, brush, and vacuum so it would look clearer. I call that a win.
- Tuesday, 11:16 AM: Spoke on the phone with Elliot’s history teacher, who sent home some kind of behavior note yesterday. Turns out it is far less official and serious than originally thought. It’s just a new system so it emails this form. Besides, she is his least favorite so I don’t doubt he might act up. Not that it’s good, mind you, but at least I understand it.
- Tuesday, 11:26 AM: Been listening to that Expose song, Season Change and I think it’s pretty appropriate. We are definitely moving into Fall and October is ending. We’ll be starting November by a trip to Mexico for my BIL’s wedding and then I can start thinking about the holidays: decorating, cooking, then Christmas shopping. I’m kind of ready!
incognitusscriptor.com 
I also love being on my own but get that at times you can feel lonely.
Feeling sick sucks doesn’t it
So sorry you are not feeling well. That makes everything worse, being alone, hearing sad news, slogging through rainy days.
Hope you get better soon and don’t have to call the A/C repair people again for a long time.
Claire,
The year has literally zinged by like a flash of light. It’s very autumn-like in east Tennessee at last. The past three or four nights have been quite chilly. I’m not ready for winter, though. I can’t believe Thanksgiving is just little more than a month away. Enjoy your day!
I’m sorry you were sad – I know what you mean, though, liking the solitude but feeling lonely at the same time. Glad you were able to finally see the bottom of your pool again – things are looking up! And a trip to Mexico for your BIL’s wedding might be just what the doc ordered to perk you up! 😉 Plus sounds like you’re excited about getting into the holidays – I am as well. 🙂 Hope you have a great week! 🙂