If you have read me for any length of time, then you know how I feel about my neighbours and the cat issue. Late last night, I started perusing the net for city of Tallahassee ordinances to see if there was anything I could do to maybe get them cited. Turns out they’re actually breaking section 4-9 article 2B which states that it’s a nuisance if cats “deposit fecal matter” onto another person’s property. I was stoked to see this and excited and all kinds of giddy. So when I called the animal control service center this morning, I stated all this but it turns out it doesn’t even matter. They’re just going to come out and set the traps.
For a brief time – ok, maybe for an hour – I felt genuinely bad about this course of action. For one, I don’t want to be the cause of demise for any animal. But – and I could use all the cliched lines about being fed up – I am seriously going abso-fucking-lutely bonkers with all this cat shit in my yard. On the other hand, I started to wonder what my neighbours will think when all the cats have magically disappeared. They obviously don’t care enough to have housecats but yet they want to feed the strays. They don’t mind the gaping hole in the side of their house that allows said strays to take shelter and procreate. But what if these cats are all the lady has? Her husband goes to work but she sits on her ass all day. Will she die inside without the daily feeding of these awful beasts? For one brief moment, I cared. Then I thought about how shitty looking their house is, how unkempt, how smelly it is when, in the winter, they open their windows. I stopped caring about them a long time ago.
At some point, this entire debacle will be behind us and the lives of those cats will be but a distant memory. I will not mourn for them; they were nature’s abominations. I have to take this step; harden my heart, as they say. I can take it no longer. I am ready to be freed of this burden.