Random Tuesday – Can’t get started, dreary, sick recovery
The weather is ugly today and that’s part of why I can’t seem to get it together today. I was awake at 6, up and about around 6:20. It was nice to get going early but I’ll be tired later. It did allow me to read, which is another thing stopping me from working.
This author, CD Reiss, is pretty amazing. I’ve ready many of her series, including this one called Marriage Games that ripped me open a few years ago. Well, I’m reading another one that has similar things in it and man it’s so engaging but also, devastating. She is a great writer, especially when she writes the “right” characters for me. Some of her stuff has too much feminism and consent in it (i.e. too blatant and obvious) but when she’s on, I cannot stop reading. And that’s not good when you have work to do!
I feel a little adrift in general. For example, we stopped into the store this morning so I could get cash for the kids for the snow cone truck that comes to camp on Tuesdays and Thursdays. For one, it turned out I already had cash but forgot. And then I took them to camp and forgot to hand it to them. Sigh. Guess I’ll be making a trip to midtown later on.
Isaac was sick, starting late Thursday night: low fever, just sort of blah. But not badly put out. He seemed like Dakota had the week before: felt decent but had this coming and going fever. Well, he beat that by Sunday morning but now he has an annoying cough. Sure, he could have had covid but who’s to say? I refuse to get a test. But what I hate is now, if anyone so much as coughs a little, people run in fear. We’ve forever changed our mindset about illness and it makes me see red. I cough often due to allergies, depending on what’s blooming. But peoples’ minds go straight to “You have the Rona and now people are gonna die!” I want to slap those people in the face.
Maybe I’m a little angry/curmudgeonly because Ash is going to a conference. He loves them though; it gives him purpose. And it is nice to get away from normal life sometimes. And it’s nice to come back to it and appreciate it. I do like that aspect of his absence: when he comes back I am eternally grateful for him and the life we have created. But that doesn’t mean the nights are any more bearable. I need something to help me sleep and I don’t know what it is but put it this way, I’ll be asking a friend of ours who might know.
I’m getting antsy for the kids’ schedules. Elliot knows his but in general, they aren’t posted to the portal. I know Dakota wants to know her teacher and for Isaac, I want to know if they gave him his first elective choice, band. I am so eager to know what he chooses. I could totally see him doing drum line, if we’re being honest. I guess now that I know when middle and high orientations are, I just want to know the rest. It feels good to see things fall into place. And we just don’t have much time before Fall starts up again.
I think one of my problems is uncertainty. Two kids starting new schools, people trying to keep us from living our lives because they like living in this virus (they do, admit it), and just a general unrest. I’m hoping this feeling passes quickly; I’d like to feel whatever normal is again.