1. What color is prominent in your home? Are you glad about that or wishing you could cover it up or remove it?

Beige? Hard to say because the living room and hall are a beige-ish but two of the bedrooms are a warm brown, one is blue, and one is a greenish (not one we did). The kitchen is in flux because we’re removing wallpaper and painting white. I am ok with the colors we have.

2. What’s something you’ll NEVER do again?

You know, I firmly believe in “never say never” but the first thing that came to mind is ski. Sure, I might try it again if we take the kids some day but the one time I went was literal hell.

3. Tell us a couple of ways you fit the stereotypes associated with your gender, and a couple of ways you don’t.

Hmm, good one. Ways I do: I go “aww” when I see a little baby; I like to get pedicures. That’s about where it ends. Ways I am not like my gender: don’t much care for frilly/pretty things; don’t scream/screech when excited; don’t like dresses; don’t drink wine; not much of a feminist; love sports and heavy metal.

4. May is Motorcycle Awareness Month. Have you ever owned a motorcycle? Ever ridden a motorcycle? If the opportunity presented itself would you hop on a motorcycle and go for a ride?

I want one! I have never been on anything more than a moped but Ash and I talk about owning a couple bikes as the kids get older. I was made for being in an MC.

5. If someone wanted to understand you, what should they read, watch, and listen to?

Read: anything by Salinger and any vampire/contemporary small-town romance novel

Watch: pro-wrestling, pro football, nerd movies like Lord of the Rings, HGTV’s shows about owning beach property.

Listen: Classic rock, 70s/80s metal, country from a couple years ago.

6.  Insert your own random thought here.

I’m gonna give you the quick and dirty version of my ongoing LG/FedEx dilemma. On March 14th, I sent Elliot’s watch (the kind that texts preset messages and calls #s I put in) back to LG because a button was stuck and it kept restarting. They sent it back and that was fixed but it wouldn’t connect to our phones. I have had to send it back THREE more times (for a problem they created!) and it’s en route but I keep missing the FedEx guy. SO, I call and ask if I can get them to release it to me without the direct signature. FOUR people from both companies said this was a possibility and then when I called to get it done, everyone said it was simply not allowed. Do we see the absurdity in this? A.) It’s my product and I am giving permission to leave it and b.) it’s a waste of time and money for the driver to attempt delivery day after day after day when no one is home. Also, I ain’t going home for 3 hours in hopes of catching him. I mean, working people cannot do that! SO I have been on multiple phone calls and been angry at a series of people. Today, if the rain lets up, I am going to try and catch the delivery guy but I am a little tired of this. Honestly, customer service ought to be better than this! Ugh!