2.) 10 reasons you should be glad I didn’t blog in my 20′s. (Inspired by Wendi Aarons and friends)
(At first, I thought this might be kind of hard but eh, maybe not…? Also, I DID blog in my 20s; there was this thing called Diary-x, but then it crashed out and died. I got a Livejournal after but hardly used it, then a Xanga, which sucked.)
1.) Well, for starters, I turned 20 in 1999, so I probably would have blogged a lot about living in an apartment with my friends and getting drunk every Saturday, partying at Brothers (the gay club; lol), then eating grilled cheese sandwiches made on the George Foreman before passing out until noon the next day. And don’t forget the KFC binge that followed. Stay classy!
2.) You would have been subjected to a lot of pictures of hot, sweaty wrestlers like this:
3.) I would have gone on an on about my then-boyfriend. Whoo boy, was I lost. He turned out to be gay and everyone saw it but me. WOW.
4.) Posts would have included lyrics from such bands as Pantera and Tool and I would have waxed poetic about my dark side and my sadness and how no one understands meeee. The artists is just SO misunderstood!
5.) There would have been a lot of photos of me in big over-sized wrestling related shirts and floaty pants. It’s a little embarrassing now but trust me; that was the style.
6.) You probably would have seen some photos of me with blue hair. And then once, this weird auburny color hair because it’s insanely hard to bleach black hair! (No photo evidence here; it’s all at home.)
7.) There may have been a post or two about staying up all night, eating Totino’s pizzas at 3 AM, and playing Magic: The Gathering or role playing computer games with friends. Nerd alert!
8.) There would have been much bitching about working at CompUSA and how much all my bosses sucked. And how incompetent people were. And how superior I apparently thought I was. UGH.
9.) I can guarantee there would have been some posts with some very bad poetry.
10.) In 2004, all my posts would have been about giving up fast food, going to Gold’s Gym, and the yearning I had for unhealthy foods. Half of the essays I wrote in my grad non-fiction workshops were about my love of food and how much it changed when I switched to a healthier lifestyle. You would have resented me.