Well, I messed that up


Honestly, I was going to post yesterday – and I even started something for the Thursday 13 meme – but my sinuses were a mess. I went to bed Wednesday night with a sore throat but thought nothing of it as I felt fine in general. Woke up yesterday with more of a scratchy throat and a stuffed up head. Oy, was it heavy. But I figured I’d feel better if I just got up and went to work. As the day went on, I felt worse and worse and ended up just leaving at noon. I went home, took a bath, and got in bed. It’s been a long long time since I was home alone in the middle of the day. The sun was sprightly and bright and the sky a clear blue. For a moment, I wanted to go out and use my new camera lens but then I remembered how crappy I felt. And moms can’t get sick so I downed about two glasses of water and went to sleep.

The evening was LONG. Isaac wanted to go to sleep early so he was in there by 6:35. I kept looking at the clock and thinking it was, say, nine, when it was, oh, 7:30. By 10, Ash wanted to watch Knowing, which I promptly fell asleep during because I hate hate hate end of the world movies. I – conveniently – woke up in time to see the last 20 minutes, which was exactly the kind of content I’d be happy to avoid my entire life. As an aside, one of the prompts on WordPress for helping people write this week was to talk about something you’ve never told anyone on your blog. This is a great time to tell you about my night terrors.

I was one of those kids who didn’t just have nightmares but rather, terrors. I’m still not totally convinced this is what I had because I can tell you that each and every time this happened, it was because I was thinking about one thing: death. I never liked the finality of it and it would send me into a panic. When I was younger, I’d get so utterly terrified by the idea that I would scream and run around the house because my mind could not find the ability to calm itself. Over the years I found ways to divert myself enough and think about others things. I’ve always wished that my faith in God and the concept of Heaven was enough to dissuade my freak-outs about dying but to this day, I still sometimes wake in the night, heart pounding and anxiety stricken.

I attribute much of this to a summer camp I went to called Camp Horizon in Leesburg, FL. It was somewhat religious and they showed us a movie about the Rapture. I don’t think Catholicism ever taught it to me in that way so after viewing it, I spent weeks thinking that any day now, the world would end and everyone I ever loved was going to be taken up into the sky, to the Heavens, and I was going to be left on the ground, lost in the chaos and burning flames. Note to self: don’t send offspring to religious camps that show this kind of thing. EVER.

The end of Knowing was NOT happy. Nic Cage is NOT a good actor. That movie is NOT worth seeing. I’m glad Ash and I are hitting the theater today so whatever we see can erase any residual memories I have of Knowing.

With that said, I’m so happy that it’s Date Day. I don’t know how other couples do it without time to themselves. Our situation is perfect because we do a half-day every other week and go out to eat and see a movie. The kids are in daycare so there’s no hassle to find a babysitter. Having a meal without wiping hands and faces of small children and/or telling them to use their inside voices is also better on my digestion. Being together in a dark theater while not for one second thinking about diapers or hungry mouths or needy three year olds is, well, it’s awesome.

Over and out. Have a good weekend!

3 thoughts on “Well, I messed that up

  1. My hubby and I try to get time for ourselves, together, but scheduling it can be hard. Bruiser is turning two soon and hopefully soon after that he will be ready for overnights at the grandparents and that will give us whole nights without kids, as Turbo is good at over nights now.
    Hope you have fun and see something good at the movies.

  2. My husband caught Knowing on the telly during one of his late night play-catch-up-with-work binges. He told me all about it the next morning and it just SOUNDED awful. As luck would have it, I caught the last 20 minutes about a week later when we were flipping through channels.

    Hope your date was awesome (and washed away all traces of Nic Cage’s end-of-the-world bonanza)!

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