On Wednesday, I’ll be 35 weeks into this journey and I think I’ve hit that point. The one where I’m ready, I’m pretty much over it, and I would really like to have my body back. Admittedly, this pregnancy has really not been that hard, nor is it now. I’m just done.
Friday night, after some, er, intimate time with the husband, I started to have these weird cramps that I thought could be preterm labor contractions. Nothing was timed or anything and I felt fine otherwise but I couldn’t sleep. I kept thinking about all the things I still hadn’t done, like raising the crib back up to newborn level, reinstalling the crib bumper, packing the hospital bag, etc. The more I thought about it, the more freaked out I became. After maybe 2 wide awake hours, I finally got to sleep and I woke Saturday feeling just fine. Well, except for the back pain. SO, that was a factor in my thinking that I will not make it to my due date.
Remember, Elliot came at 37.5 weeks. I have a fairly good chance of having this kid early as well. This means so many things in the upcoming weeks. I have to plan my April calendar for my class so that if anyone has to go in there and proctor stuff, they won’t be lost. Same goes for the students. There’s always so much up in the air when you come this close to delivery and I think I’m going a little batty. I’m ready to just kind of do nothing even though once Isaac is here, there’s anything BUT nothing to do. I can’t be one of the women who takes a week off before their due date to just relax. I can’t justify it. And besides, I can’t count on that due date anyway.
So here I am, feeling ridiculously close to labor and trying not to think about the impending pain, then the never-ending non-sleeping cycle and the whole newborn cuteness which is quickly eroded away by the fact that I don’t sleep… it’s just insane. PLUS, I really want to spend money right now. Which is totally unlike me. I mean, I feel like dropping hundreds of dollars. I don’t even know WHAT I want to buy. I just want to spend. Isn’t that weird? I’m going to old Navy tonight to find him a St. Patty’s Day shirt; maybe that’ll quell my desire to waste money.
I know I sound fairly crazy in this post but if you were this pregnant, you might feel that way too. Pregnancy makes you do weird things and I can’t account for them. But I sure could use some ice cream right about now…