Although I have gotten A LOT done this week – been one of the busiest that I can remember – I have been making so many excuses for all the things I have yet to get around to. And I sort of feel like I need to stop, because I can’t do it ALL -I’m not SuperMom – and yet, I keep telling myself the reasons for not doing X and Y and I make myself feel bad. It’s a stupid, viscous cycle.
Yesterday was downright awful. Just a collection of tiny things that happened, creating one shit-tastic day. It started with my online class evals. I sort of already had an idea of who would say something. I had a guy all semester who NEVER knew where to post things. No one else had problems but that’s because they read the directions. Just this guy. But I had a feeling he was the type to bitch about it later. Personally, we should really let students do evals after their grades post. I cut that song of a bitch a lot of slack and once he saw his grade, I doubt my review would have been so negative.
Somewhere between that and class, I was just swamped. Couldn’t catch up if I wanted to. Then, 15 minutes before class, day care called to say Elliot ran into a door and hit his head, hard. They said he staggered and cried but seems ok. He didn’t pass out. But they wanted me to come take a look at him anyway. SO, I run down to my room and make some half-assed apology to 26 18 year-olds who couldn’t give a shit about me or my kid and they bemoaned the fact that they came “all the way” to class only to have it canceled. Honestly, they seem to have regretted their initial reaction; I got some emails later saying they hoped everything was ok. It was just a reminder that kids these days are so effing self-absorbed. Argh.
Ok, so I am trying to get up out of here and the tiny-ass screw that holds my glasses arm in place decided to come loose. THEN, I’m about four blocks away from work and guys in orange vests are tearing up an intersection, rerouting me about three blocks out of my way. Once to day care, Elliot seemed… OK. Shaken but ok. He wanted to come back with me so I agreed and we went back to my office. He managed to take a nap on the floor. But when he woke up, he was so on and off cranky and nice I couldn’t handle it and we had to leave. It was at this point I realized that I felt completely and utterly overwhelmed. For about 45 minutes, Elliot played in his room while I laid on his bed, just being blah.
I opted out of yoga. Ash and Ell still went to Boston Market like they normally do on Wednesdays and I got some time to recover. I took a bath and installed programs on my computer, since I have another hard drive in there and it’s been reinstalled with Windows 7. I really needed that time to regroup. The rest of the night was actually pleasant; Ash brought me a sandwich from Boston Market and I put a bunch of songs n my ipod.
So today, I feel like things can only get better. I had juice for breakfast instead of coffee and I’m going to gorge myself on Chinese for lunch. It might be freakin’ freezing outside – still – but this Thursday will be awesome!