With our meme host still on vaycay, I’ll forgo the confessions today and move along as usual.
Is there a word or a sound that could correctly convey how exasperated and exhausted I feel? Maybe. I don’t know it, though. The initial shock of the unexpected expenses has blown over and now it’s a matter of logistics and planning and being smart.
I need to find a way to achieve balance, emotionally.
My tattoo appointment is tonight and I am both exceedingly excited and nervous. This is a reward to myself for two years of running and races I’ve committed to and finished. It’s a motivator to continue running for my health and my children. And I am reconsidering its location. I have a calf tattoo and I was pretty committed to putting this one on my other calf. But now maybe I am thinking my opposite thigh, on the back – of course, so other runners can see it – but I feel so conflicted. Argh! Where is best?
Ash originally wanted to go with me – excited even – but this morning, when I mentioned the babysitter coming so we could go, he was like, “why do I need to be there?” Argh. Then he confirmed the time and I guess resigned himself. Last night he was all supportive about how I feel guilty over spending money on myself in the face of all these other things. He was so positive about how I work hard for my money and my family and rewarding myself is OK. I really hate how everyone can change day to day. Please, world, try to be just a little bit consistent, OK?
I have papers to grade and only need to make it until 3, since I am then going to register Elliot for Kindergarten. I am taking that in stride too; he’s going to be 5? Are you KIDDING me? That’s what my little internal voice keeps saying. But as you know, you cannot stop children from aging so better just accept it. Honestly, I am excited for him to be in real school. I am hoping it helps him to mature a bit. Prime example: last night we were Skyping with my mom and when asked what he did in school, he replied, “Um… pooped on my face.”Seriously boy? I’m typically not embarrassed by much but that got to me. I wanted to give him a good spanking and send him to bed but that kind of attention only bolsters it. I am almost certain that comes from just hanging out with the other boys at school. But still, so irritating. They simply have no filters.
This post is all over the place and I have way too much to do. I hope everyone has a great weekend!