Momentum


Monday afternoon, when I was running out of steam and decided to close all my Word documents and stop grading papers, I did a search on my blog for the phrase “night rain”, because I know I once wrote about it.

March 2, 2007:

I have always liked the words “night rain” together. They sound so poetic. We were surrounded by horrific storms all last night as they swept across the panhandle of Florida and lower regions of Alabama and Georgia. Around 12:30, the wind began to pick up, sending various bits of loose tree branches across our wooden deck and crashing down onto our roof. Soon after, the booming thunder began to rumble.

I remember this time; I was newly pregnant – just about 2 months – and my life was simpler and I felt more poetic about things like storms and such. I often wrote what I was thinking in an actual journal. In fact, up until about maybe five months ago, I still occasionally did. I’ve drifted from this lately, due in part to the lack of desire and my carpal tunnel.

**************

When I woke this morning and was driving Elliot to school, “Only Time Will Tell” by Asia came on the 80s on 8 xm station. The sound of the song – Asia has a tendency to play big, epic sounds – made me think of my past in a sort of warm fuzzy way. As always, I go in cycles of feeling this way and I embrace them; picturing brief moments, like snapshots.

On my way back from lunch, I saw various kids in the neighbourhood outside, in their yards and driveways, lazily shooting hoops or trying tricks on boards, and I remember those summers when I could do just that: nothing.

All this is leading up to me actually feeling compelled to write, and not just saying in my blog that I want to. Because I have done that numerous times! I opened a Word document today and stared at it a while, actually getting some really good ideas. But then work caught up with me and I have been busy ever since. I am jealous of people who actually carve out time in their days to write. I could do this, surely, after Elliot is in bed. But I am usually busy with: laundry, dishes, working out, TV (ok, you gotta give me some veg out time), and/or other various things that don’t include sitting at a computer, which I happened to have done ALL DAY. And now, since Ash’s motherboard died and my processor is on the outs, we’re sharing the one backup machine and my god, I don’t know how other folks do it. I think we’re spoiled.

And as I bring this post to a close, I begin to type the first few sentences of this new document… that will hopefully turn into something. Wish me luck…

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