Sleeping, dreaming, shivering


Three nights in a row. That’s how good my little one is. Yes, that’s three nights of much better sleep for me. However, my body is a little slow to catch up with his new feeding schedule and my breasts pay dearly for being overfull. Have another blocked duct and let’s hope and pray it doesn’t turn into Mastitis AGAIN.

With that said, I was thinking about the things I daydream about when I don’t feel well or when things are getting me down. When I was a kid and I had nightmares (actually, I was one of those kids who suffered from night terrors) my mother would come into my room and calm me, telling me to think happy thoughts. I always always always thought about Disney World. The funny thing is, I still sometimes resort to that when I am down. I conjure up images of that first long hallway as you enter the Magic Kingdom, the one where they have posters of the rides lining the walls. I think about the train that circles that park; the teepee and Indians near Tom Sawyer’s island. I remember with fondness the Carousel of Progress and the old song(Now is the time, now is the best time…). I think about EPCOT and Horizons, the best defunct ride. The giant vegetables in The Land, the lighted sidewalks, the weird musty smell at the France pavilion that I complained about every time my mother dragged me into that movie. All of these images made me feel calm and blissful and I could find sleep, even in fever and illness.

The last time I was really sick and the chills and hot flashes kept me awake, I thought about Hawaii. Hands down the best vacation I have ever been on. The reason it wasn’t like any old vacation was because we didn’t stress about making sure we had activities planned. In fact, we did a lot of stuff with little to no planning. We climbed Diamond Head on a whim, bought tickets to snorkel at Hanauma Bay because they sold them in our hotel’s lobby, and went to dinner in fancy restaurants just because we felt like it. Everything was so perfect. Only one day did we feel the slight grumpiness of being in a foreign place; we stayed in the hotel, took baths, and watched Wedding Crashers on Pay Per View. On the day before we left, I went to the spa and had a 90 minute hot stone massage. I had free reign in the spa area: sauna, jacuzzi, showers, etc. When I was sick last time and felt cold, I kept imagining myself in that whirlpool, under a flower wrapped arbor, on the balcony overlooking the entire city of Honolulu. That morning was cooler with a bit of misty rain but still sunny. It was an idyllic setting and one that to this day cannot be matched but serves as a peaceful mental getaway.

Today is cold (30) and overcast. If not for a sleeping baby who is sure to be waking soon, I would run a bath and think back to the above memories and slowly drift away…

One thought on “Sleeping, dreaming, shivering

  1. I’m so jealous of your guy STTN! LUCKY! I’m crossing my fingers that the blocked duct doesn’t turn into Mastitis. I totally agree with you on the awesomeness that is Hawaii. Feel better 🙂

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