Tuesday of week one is like Monday all over again – for the students who have Tuesday/Thursday classes. I love it. I mean that honestly; I love the craziness of the beginning of school. It’s chaotic and frenetic but it am busy all day and I don’t have time to stop and be bored or think about my back pain or worry. And that’s exactly what I want. Actually, I have been feeling pretty decent since my semi-breakdown on Sunday.
I began the Great Closet Clean-Out on Sunday morning. In our office closet, someone before us built shelves and cubbies that, although useful, take up space that could be better used to stack bins. Plus, I knew there was a decade worth of trash in there. Indeed, I threw out at least six bags of varying sizes with stuff I cannot believe I hadn’t chucked long ago. I should have taken pictures. My method of cleaning involves pulling everything out and then rummaging through it. This apparently pissed off Ash, who thought I should have put all books in bins first and then gone box by box. So I was already overwhelmed when he mentioned this and I broke. I was angry and hateful and disappointed in myself, most of all. Going through all the boxes of crafts and good intentions for projects just made me feel sad. It reminded me of all the things I don’t finish. It was one of the single most depressing moments.
But I got it done and moved on. Except, I found myself to be exceedingly weepy ALL DAY. It was pretty pathetic actually. Every time I thought about the mounds of laundry to be done? Cry. Elliot bit a dog? Cry, woe. I was not myself. And I was hungry but not feeling like any of the food we had in there. At three, I got a sub from Subway. At eight, we had Hungry Howies. Though it all tasted so good, I let me healthiness slip a little. But sometimes you need to feed your soul, silly as that sounds. And dammit, I craved pizza.
But the fact is, I turned a corner and am feeling pretty good. For a couple weeks there, I was sleeping like total crap. And with my severe cut back on caffeine, I was one unhappy camper. Last night, however, I slept all the way through: from about 11 until 6. It was relatively amazing and I cannot believe what a night without waking up two, three times can do to your overall psyche.
In other news, I am about to finish Dead Until Dark, the first of the Sookie Stackhouse books, that True Blood is based on. It’s ok. Her writing style is kind of like mine in that it’s not that great but it’s a quick read and still entertaining. I still think I like Twilight better, even though these books have far more rousing vampire sex in them. I don’t have to have it in my book, you know? I’ve put the next two on hold at the library. I will read them but I won’t own them.
It’s getting crazy now at work so I’m off to relocate freshmen and do some hand-holding; it’s in my job description.