Old me vs. new me

I started out the morning feeling old – for reasons I shall go into momentarily – and I am feeling older still as the late afternoon back pain sets in, right where my spinal cord meets my tail bone, which might actually be where baby Elliot is resting, ever so peacefully I am sure, according to my doctor’s nurse on the phone. I called to ask what they typically tell women with lower back pain and no other weird symptoms. Of course, take Tylenol, use a heating pad, etc. Or just try to stand up more – ugh.

So yes, this morning, as I walked past the inoperable Westcott fountain, I was thinking about how much I just paid for a bagel with cream cheese. It was roughly $1.79. I remembered that when I was a junior I could go across the street from my high school to a little place called Danny’s bagels and get the softest, tastiest bagel with cream cheese for 95 cents flat. And then I realized that the year was 1996 and that’s more than a decade ago. It didn’t seem all that long ago… I don’t remember it being so distant.

The same holds true for gas prices. In 1997, I could pay 98 cents a gallon for regular. Last week, I paid $2.95. Again, the difference a decade makes. I sometimes like to think back to the changes I have made in the past decade and honestly, some of them are pretty amazing. When I was a junior at lake Brantley high, I was an interesting individual. I was still very much into the idea of bucking all trends (to a certain extent) and trying to express myself in whatever way possible. I listened to punk music and hung out with the skateboarders. I wore boyish clothes and tried to be cool without being popular. I reflect on my fashion, my choices, and don’t regret the things I did. Maybe I was silly and maybe people made fun of me but I was still me. I came into my own sometime early in college but it took a little while for me to stop wearing baggy pants and t-shirts all the time. I still don’t dress up and I still listen to whatever music I want, hardly anything popular. This time it’s not out of spite or to be different. Now it’s just because this is who I am and where I am; I pay almost 3 bucks for gas and almost 2 bucks for a bagel but I’m happy.

I think one of the keys to happiness is to not let yourself have regrets – come to terms with the truth. That’s some sage advice.

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