8:42 AM:

Blaarrggh. Isaac didn’t exactly sleep well last night. In reality, it probably wasn’t as bad as I feel it was. I’m just super tired. He was awake for an hour around 2:30 or so and it’s not like he was wide awake and flailing, like he tends to be, but he laid quietly on my chest while we rocked. My problem is that I hate going back to bed knowing he’s still awake. I sleep better when I’ve put him down and I can be pretty sure he’ll drift back to sleep soon. Otherwise, I’ll probably be up again and that brief time back in bed was just a tease and dammit, I won’t do that to myself. Not this time around. You learn a thing or two after the first kid.

*****

3:50 PM:

Just finished calculating and submitting grades for my class. I was surprised at some of them; some people failed to do the journals and that’s ten points gone right there. But their final projects blew me right out of the water and it warms a teacher’s heart to see student dedication. This was an… interesting class. I don’t think we necessarily meshed well; they were excellent writers but not the best students. Some were lazy and some couldn’t get to class and still others wanted to argue about the nature of each assignment. Yet, they were clearly all very intelligent and skilled writers. Very weird combination for a teacher to deal with.

Isaac was particularly inconsolable this afternoon. He acted like he was hungry but would only eat for five minutes or so before crying again. I figured it was gas so I tried all manner of burping methods and all carrying positions. He finally calmed down after – god, I don’t know – maybe an hour of on and off fussing and crying. Thankfully, he’s sleeping now. It’s weird but sometimes I look down at him sleeping in the crib and all I can see is baby Elliot. Then the realization hits me that this is a completely different kid; someone else entirely and Elliot has come a long way from that tiny squabbling babe over two and a half years ago. It’s difficult for a mother to wrap her head around this concept, even though it’s simple: I have two sons now and each will be their own person. Mind-blowing, I tell you.

Now that I’ve missed Color Splash, I’d better go utilize my free time. In less than an hour, everyone will be home, Ash’s friends will be over to climb, and my night will just be getting started. Ahh, life with a newborn.