Making it happen

It rained in the night. Our house, although not very well insulated, somehow does a wonderful job of keeping out the sound of rain and sometimes I cannot even tell it is falling. I only knew because I was up feeding The Little at about 1:30 and above the subtle din of the humidifier, I could hear it pounding on our roof. Everything was wet this morning and it was cool out, dark, miserable. I couldn’t believe how gray the skies were even as I left daycare and approached school. But just as I was coming up the hill of College avenue, towards the Westcott building, out came the sun and graced campus with its sprightly brightness.

And then it went away and has stayed away ever since.

In a lot of ways, this is a pretty good metaphor for the things happening around me lately. All the time, people are getting married, divorced, having children, dying, getting fired, hired, making life changes and hitting stumbling blocks. It just seems like lately, a lot of these things are in close proximity to my life and my friends/family. One of our friends is getting divorced. We know them both so it kind of came as a shock. The reasons (which I shall not divulge here) are unbelievable to me and I am sorry that it’s working out so horribly. My friend’s friend’s husband just died last night of brain cancer. She is distraught beyond belief. And yet, some good comes out of all this too: one of our friends got into an elite economics program in London. My friend’s sister-in-law is about to have a baby any hour now. My sister finally found an apartment in New York. Our friends, Randy and Bree, just got married. This is life, this is how things always happen. I’m just not used to it happening all around me, this close.

I was thinking about this on my drive into work and I realized that your life is made up of all these experiences and for the most part, you have to make them happen. You have to get out there and set things in motion. For example, my mother ran (ok, walked) a 5k this weekend. I can do that. I’ve wanted to do that. But the 5k isn’t going to come to me; I’ll have to find it, register and get out there. I want to make more friends. It’s rare that they actually come to you; for the most part, you have to be at least as reciprocal and make things happen. Invite them to movies, coffee. I have always been very reserved, waiting for the world to show up at my doorstep. But having a kid and growing up a little has shown me that I control my own destiny.

And right now, my destiny is to get a chicken quesadilla and a drink.

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