I saved a worm on the way into work today.
It’s still cold in my office so I finally contacted Environmental Health and Safety services for employees. The person has not replied yet but I think I have contracted a cough from the 60 degree air pouring into my tiny office. I hate to actually contact someone about this but I really have had enough torture.
I have been very… unmoody during this pregnancy. I would say I have cried and/or gotten angry much less than a normal PMS stint. However, last night I finally broke. I couldn’t take the pressure anymore. It began when I realized I have gotten just big enough to be incapable of easily getting out of the tub. I pulled myself up with one hand on the built in soap caddy and the other on the sliding door. However, I squished my finger in between said sliding doors and even though it wasn’t all that painful, the tears began to flow. This then opened the floodgates to all my worries and apprehensions: money, ultrasound tomorrow, work, leaving work, breastfeeding, everything. It all seemed so overwhelming. I cried to Ash and then got in bed. I think it was only 9 but I stayed there, drifting in and out of sleep, hiding from the world. Perhaps that’s not the way to deal with problems but it seemed right at the time.
Today, I am ok. I *almost* didn’t come into work at all. There’s almost no purpose. Tomorrow I have training but today, there’s nothing. What do you do on a day like this? I can only play games and read news so much. Sure, there are some projects I could work on. But the motivation simply is not there.
How do you get motivated?
incognitusscriptor.com 
I get motivated by looking ahead to the future. I’m grading right now, and will be finished by Saturday, I hope. But then I have to start planning my summer and fall syllabi. So I look for motivation there, since I want to be a kick-ass teacher and all.
Hi! First off, it’s been ages since I’ve read other people’s blogs, so I feel terrible for not even knowing you were pregnant. Congrats! (Also, as I was scrolling through you blog to find out when you announced, I happened to click on that Name the States quiz and to my eternal shame, I missed Arkansas, Indiana, Maryland, Missouri, Oklahoma, Utah, and Vermont. I mean, how could I have missed Oklahoma? I used to bellow the show tune at the top of my lungs when I was a kid) As for this post, I can’t offer an advice on motivation because I have zero motivation. I’ve been telling myself, “Self, you are not going to be able to watch a movie or go online or…eat, until you write something.” But it never works.
Thanks for the congrats. And yeah, I’m the same about the motivation. I’m hoping now that I have had lunch I can kick my ass into gear.