If “con” is the opposite of “pro,” then what is the opposite of progress?
Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why do you press harder on a remote control when you know the battery is dead?
Why is bottled lemon juice made with artificial flavors but dish washing liquid made with “real” lemons?
incognitusscriptor.com 
Why do we drive on parkways, but park on driveways?
And what’s the deal with airline food?
Chuck Norris once plucked a single hair from his beard and skewered three men through the heart with it.
Mentioning student elections, it’s that time of year again at UF, too. Our two student political parties are the Gator and the Pants party. The former is mostly Greek. Neither do a give a rat’s behind.