I owe ya 4 x365 entries and they’re coming soon, I promise. I’m formulating in my brain right now.
I had this whole articulate entry formed inside my head this morning about something I did over the weekend. I just hope it doesn’t fail to amuse you the way it did me while I was showering. Although, I was half-conscious then so you know, it’s a different situation now.
So, on Saturday, I went and got myself a massage. A new place opened called Massage Envy and they offered a “low introductory rate”. And that it was. Typically massages run about a dollar a minute. This was a 50 minute for 39 bucks. Not bad. So, I called ahead and scheduled. And I requested a male.
I have had 3 other massages in my life. The first one was in October of 2005 and took place in my hotel in Hawaii. When I booked it a couple days before, they asked if I wanted a woman or a man and I said I didn’t care. Ash got on me saying I should care more and choose one. I chose male. And when I got there, no men were working so I got a girl anyway. Regardless, that was simply the best massage I could have ever imagined. It was a 90 minute hot stone treatment complete with essential oils and this technique called body brushing, which, should you ever have the oppurtunity, I highly recommend. I left that cozy room feeling so refreshed. I was tempted to stick around the spa – they give you a full day pass when you purchase a service – and just hang out in the sauna, whirlpool, etc, but since it was my honeymoon, I felt I should return to the room with my new husband.
My second massage was right around May of ’06 when I graduated with my Masters. My mom gave me a gift certificate to an Aveda spa in town. The woman I got, a rather large lady, was – let’s suffice to say – awful. She clearly had no technique whatsoever and her big boobs kept flopping on me. It was an overall crappy experience. And I’m looking at you Aveda. You’re supposed to train your employees. She sucked!
Massage #3 – this past March. Another rather large woman but she was trained. She was really good actually; very precise with her movements and she also gave a great facial. Her only downfall was that she talked too much. And I am always torn on that aspect. On the one hand, it’s a lot like getting your hair done and you know stylists love to gab. But when I am being rubbed down, I’m really trying to relax, release my cares and just be. But this girl wanted to go on and on about her new husband and his many flaws and their money issues and so on and so forth. I can’t say it was a bad conversation but I found myself just wanting to tell her to STFU.
This brings us to Saturday, where I had a 10 o’clock appointment with “Richard.” And to be honest with you, when I saw this middle-aged, skinny, sunken-chested guy who wore glasses and looked like an ex-hippie, I was worried. It’s shallow of me to say but he looked a little… creepy. Like he’d be the guy leering at you on the bus or something. Luckily, Richard turned out to be about my age, dark hair and a goatee, khaki shorts, brown Chucks. I still don’t think it matters what the gender of my masseuse is but really, their ability to make me feel comfortable on the table. Richard was nice but not too chatty. He was considerate and made sure I was happy with the amount of pressure. And let me tell you, his hands were objects imbued with magical powers. Oh, for my back simply melted underneath their touch. I mentioned my lower back pain from carrying E and my carpal tunnel. He performed some skilled maneuvers that suddenly whisked away all pain from these areas. Amazing! This one funny thing happened during the massage that almost made me giggle out loud: his stomach was rumbling. It reminded me how everyone is human and we all experience little things like that that almost seem embarrassing. I thought it was cute.
This place offers a membership plan based around making massage therapy cheaper and easily accessible. I would do it if this economy didn’t suck or if I wasn’t going to feel guilty about 59 bucks a month for a massage. Granted, a one time fee might run anywhere from 50-75 bucks so it would be saving money. Deep down, I know I won’t do it. However, I will be going back at some point. And I’ll be requesting Richard.